Another ridiculous fwd.

There's been a lot of forwards flooding my inbox, mainly from b'lore before and after the murder of a call centre employee. I wonder how the B'loreans keep such a network and are so immensely kind to pass on the words of wisdom to every id in the addressbook. Even as i write this post i get a mail with the subject: Pass this on to 10 people, save 10 lives...

But there was this highly amusing mail that i received a while ago, that i just couldn't resist sharing. Well, as expected you'd have it in your inbox long before you read this, but what if you've deleted it just like i always do??... It deserves to be read.

Stuff in Italics is my work and those in bold were bold in the mail i received.

"With the incidents happening around us and the crime that is been reported we can SAFELY say that each day is getting worse in our good old garden city. Under this situation we will always have a question in our conscious mind which asks us AM I SAFE ? No one can give you an accurate answer to this .... (Ofcourse none can, you expect people to guard your posterior every second???)

Crime is like an accident which we can meet up with at anytime. (True, Very true, words of wisdom)

The best way not to meet with it is to follow the doctors proverb "PRECAUTION IS BETTER THAN CURE" (think he realised how bad he is in making up quotes) Crime happens only if there is opportunity given to it or when there is chance for it.

A few tips that can definitely help everyone,

1) Avoid speaking to people whom you don't know (Are you serious? Guys... this is damnation to all the casanovas in the garden city)

2) Avoid late night parties (this guy's highly frustrated)

3) Do not mix drinking with your wonderful ability to drive (One point i agree)

4) Avoid taking ladies to the late night parties, if you cannot avoid then try going in groups (Who goes to late night parties without ladies, and that you've asked to avoid booze... Better not have them then..What? he mentioned this before.. brilliant!!)

7) Avoid taking short cuts when going out in the nights. (Bangalore and shortcuts? That itself accounts for a joke)

8) Avoid restaurant/dhabas in the outskirts of the city as these are places where anti social elements usually hang out (Kay, I better become anti-social before i hang out there.)

9) Report incidents to the police if you feel it is the correct information that you are providing to them. (When do you know its correct?, like some inner voice telling?)

10) Make sure you inform any one before you visit them late at night and also specify time frames (Unfortunately, I'm single. Can i have your number please)

10) Couples in love please please avoid meeting up in lonely places.
(Guys, do all that you do in Lalbagh in Forum n Central now. God save you from the Moral Police)

11) Avoid arguing with auto rickshaw drivers and also when you find people who are fighting on roads (it could be a trap) (C'mon... I'll lose a thousand a week if i dont argue with them)

12) Avoid having personal and friendly conversation with taxi drivers, auto rickshaw drivers , Cab drivers (Specially women) (Another MCP!)

13) If the driver behaves suspiciously/ rudely try to divert the vehicle to some public place and then immediately get off. Inform the transport department and your manager. (I bet anyone would do this..)

14) Women make sure that you are carrying something to protect yourselves such as a bottle of pepper spray and also make sure that you are wearing a jacket or a shawl if you are not escorted by a man whom you know. (I just can't understand the place of a jacket and a shawl in this situation, What do you with them,strangle the offender?...)